"The Situation" nets $400k for endorsing Protein Vodka

TMZ.com If you have ever thought to yourself, "Man, I want to drink whatever vodka The Situation drinks. And I wish it had protein in it too. But nah, that will never happen" -- boy, do we have a surprise for you!

Sources tell TMZ the "Jersey Shore" money machine scored a $400,000 signing bonus to be the spokesman for a vodka company called Devotion.

But this ain't no ordinary booze -- Devotion contains a clear protein called Casein ... which can support an increase in lean body mass and a decrease in body fat if the user is also on some sort of weight training program. 

You've gotta be fucking kidding me...  Now let me start by saying - I'm a fan of Jersey Shore, the show is hilarious watching these clowns troll smokes and waiting for JWOW's tits to explode...  Flame all you want, but the show is classic, and the shit they come up with like "grenades", "landmines", and GFF is fucking hilarius.  They deserve what they are getting paid, not because they have a shred of talent - but because we're all retarded enough to keep tuning in to see what skanks they are going to reel in this week.  So if MTV rakes it from the show, so should they.  But really, $400,000 for shilling a protein enhanced vodka... There are so many things wrong with this picture.

First, who gives a fuck about protein in their drank - the only thing I care about is its proof, how fast is this shit going to get me to blackout stage.

Second, this shit can't taste good.  Vodka is supposed to contain one thing - alcohol (see above) - adding anything else is going to make it taste like dick.  This is just another marketing ploy to appeal to Ed Hardy loving dickbags.  Infused with protein, The Situation is probably stirring each batch with his dick laughing all the way to the bank.

Finally, what the fuck are we doing wrong... $400,000 to promote semen-laced vodka... We'll be lucky to make 400 bucks from Barstool Philadelphia... Fuck this.

The first time I hear anyone order this shit I'm going to punch them in the dick.  If you are that concerned about sticking to your GTL regimen, you shouldn't be at the bar, you should off yourself.  If you buy a bottle of this shit, you should also reconsider the air you are taking up on the planet.